From Porn to ISIS, the Egyptian Pyramids Are Under Siege

LOS ANGELES—Don't count the Egyptian pyramids out just yet, but the wonders of the world are most certainly under siege of late, first by pornographers and now by ISIS, two groups that are not exactly kissing cousins. First there was the Russian porn star named Aurita, who, seeking an unorthodox place to shoot a little porn, decided that the pyramids fit the bill, even though she can be heard on the tape complaining about how the location "fucking sucks. What is there to look at?…Even our resorts are better.” This incident took place last year, but was made public recently and now the Egyptian government, which harbors no love of porn, is investigating the incident. The punishment would probably not be something they dish out at the resorts. This story also comes on the heels of the news about the two American women arrested last week for carving their names into the walls of the Roman Coliseum. The two stories seemed to support a narrative about disrespect for ancient treasures, which most people actually like and would rather keep around. But not everyone. Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of ISIS, has just joined the ranks of all the other caliphate-inspired killers calling for the destruction of the Egyptian pyramids as well as the Sphinx, a fate the remorseless murderers would surely meet out to the ancient tombs should they get the opportunity and the means. It should not have to be said that the acts of "sexpass" (sex + trespass) and the defacement of the Coliseum, as stupid as that was, have nothing in common with ISIS' threats of complete obliteration, though I have no doubt that someone is sure to try to seriously connect the two. But the fact is that people have been having sex in graveyards for as long as there have been graveyards, and for very good reasons—It can be very sexy/scary and you're less likely to get caught. And idiots always try to carve their initials into the walls of famous places. That's why God made security guards. On the other hand, only truly demented fucks believe they are justified in destroying history, and especially its literal manifestations, most of which are with us for a relative blink of an eye anyway.