Attention, Travelers: Be A Photographer for 'Misty Beethoven'!

MILFORD TWP., NJ—It's a little known fact that in 1975 when Radley Metzger shot footage in Paris and Rome for The Opening of Misty Beethoven, he borrowed local crew and equipment to do so. Whether you missed the opportunity to be part of his crew because you missed the Metro when you stopped to tie your shoe or because you foolishly hadn't gotten around to being born yet, you've been granted a second chance! If you live in/near Rome or Paris (or will be visiting either in the next three weeks) and own or can borrow a camera or camcorder, you can show up 36-1/2 years late to the filming and be part of an extra feature on the upcoming special edition of The Opening of Misty Beethoven! In return for taking photographs and/or footage from the same position and angle as the original film's crew in a handful of locations around either or both of those cities, you will get: 1) A free copy of the upcoming The Opening of Misty Beethoven special edition. 2) Your name (or chosen nom-de-porn) in the credits of the feature or featurette in which your photographs appear. 3) A certificate proudly proclaiming that by virtue of your photograph appearing on a disc containing pornographic material you are, by the commutative property of ill repute, ipso facto a Porn Photographer who worked on The Opening of Misty Beethoven. On April 1st, Distribpix will select one lucky photographer for (or from) each city, giving special preference to those with good cameras and photographic skills (with bonus points awarded to anyone willing to debase themselves or their friends by dressing and posing in place of the stars of the film). Street addresses and reference photos (both then and now) will be provided and stills or footage must be submitted to us electronically on or before April 15. Just e-mail your information and qualifications (such as they are) to distribpix@gmail.com before April 1st and we'll let you know if you've been chosen!